Princess Ellie's Demolition Company

As your Most Benevolent Monarch, it is my solemn duty to destroy particular objects which simply must go. Mommy and Daddy seem to believe that this destruction is simply of my own free will, but I know it to be much, much more important than they could ever realize. Let me walk you through some of my more prodigious demolitions as of late. You may request further explanation as to why these were the specific objects I felt I needed to ruin, but I cannot, other than to say that I felt so moved. Perhaps it is simply due to the very apparent fact that this is a talent at which I am extremely proficient, and to which I have a strong affinity.

1. Sky Mall

This was during one of my more disagreeable experiences aboard a plane. My more faithful citizens will recall that I do not appreciate planes. If you are not a faithful reader and do not recall how clearly I have stated how little I care for flights, repent swiftly to avoid my retribution and click on one of the links that are on the right. I do not know to what my Daddy refers when he utilizes the words "links" and "right", but he informed me that you would find my entries by exploiting these functions. Anyhow, Mommy and Daddy presented me with a very disturbing piece of literature of which I knew should be immediately shredded. Lackaday, I was unable to completely rid future patrons of this plane of having to lay their eyes on such a horrid debacle. 

2. The Ensign and Other Books with Soft Pages

These are not offensive like their nefarious brother Sky Mall, but I simply know that their pages must be eaten. Alas, much like its predecessor, they are removed from my grasp, not always before my attempts to consume their flimsy pages results in a loud ripping noise. This appears to be especially disturbing when done to one of those green books my parents insist on gazing upon in Church while making loud musical noises with their mouths. This has amounted to my reading to be reduced to books made of board. This fits my liking, as all of those other books, as far as I can tell, are only usable once before they are completely unreadable due to the pages going missing.

3. This Wrapper

GrandMommyServant Little, along with Mommy and Daddy, had shown that this material, when ripped, produced a treat which would present my future. I was quite unsuccessful, but GrandMommyServant Little was most kind to removed the pieces from my hand when asked.

This photograph is very unflattering. Please remove it. Oh, you will not? Well then let me. dfsakjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj. Cursed personal computing device; you win this time.

4. Block Towers

Mommy continually refuses to seek the proper permits for these constructions, and it is my duty to not allow such unlawful acts. Also, these blocks are very delectable and should not be used for such menial designs.