What is up with these parental units of mine? I know I am a princess, so they must be some sort of royalty, but they certainly do not treat me like it. They laugh and take pictures of my face when I am having especially uncomfortable bowel movements. When I go to sleep, they bind my arms to my body as if they were putting me in some sort of straight jacket. I would complain to them more, and fight against it more, if it wasn't so delightfully comfortable. When they feed me, they stop halfway through and smack me on my back and make me burp, which is not a very princessy thing to do. I try to tell them to stop, but they just keep doing it. The thing I hate the most, though, beside the lotion I mentioned last week, is when Mommy sticks this thing into my nostrils and tries to vacuum the mucus out of my nose. It is not only uncomfortable and disconcerting, it is also embarrassingly unflattering. Even this would not be enough to write a whole journal entroy on my complaints if it wsan't for the fact that they took my abuse too far this past week. Now you may not believe what iam about to say but I swear on the mystical bottle from whence all food comes that it is true: They stabbed me! the fiends did not even have the decency to perform the nefarious act themselves, they took me to what seemed to be a specialist to do it. I was just lying there, smiling a little at who-knows-what, then STAB! STAB! Yes, they did it TWICE, once in each leg! They called the stabbings shots, but even I know the difference between being shot and being stabbed. You know what made the whole situation worse? They added insult to injury by laughing when I immediately filed a verbal grievance with them! That's the worst part about trying to complain to these people - they never take my cries seriously. They will laugh, say "You're alright!" (obviously I am not alright if I'm crying, even if I don't know why), blow air in my mouth and laugh when it startles me and distracts me mid-whimper, give me what I want, or stick this pacifier thing in my mouth, which is weird and doesn't give me any food and is kinda nise and really comforting and...
What was I complaining about? I don't remember. Life is great! I'mre really starting to be able to hold up my head on my own, and I like doing it so much I don't like being held sideways anymore. My Grandma Little was here all week and never left me alone. Last Sunday they dressed me up in a really pretty and uncomfortable dres and bounced me in the middle of this circle of men while Daddy gave me a message from my Heavenly Daddy. And this week Mommy made us matching skirts for church, which was so adorable I just had to be fussy when they tried to get a picture of us together. I am a logical girl, after all.
Love,
Princess Ellie
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