Conference Weekend

I know that I wrote an entry only yesterday, but I have reached some significant milestones and funny stories since then.
Today was the second day of this conference thing that my parents were watching. Last conference that my parents took me to, if you happen to remember, I figured out how to make the world flip so I was on my belly. Well, I do not know if I receive inspiration like my parents do, or if I am just jealous of them looking at something other than me, but I used this conference to learn to flip the world the other way so I can go back onto my back! I have found this tactic to be very useful. My parents hope that this will cease my needless tirades which I do at random times when attempting to sleep on my belly. They really do not understand me.
Then later, Daddy was changing my waste removal garment, and just after he had placed a new one beneath me but had not clasped it on, they began to mock how I drink out of my bottle by waving their arms in the air. So I scooted a little off of the diaper and pooped. Serves them right for not giving me the respect I deserve. You should have seen them trying to figure out what to do with me as I kept on pooping and peeing at the most inopportune moments! It was hilarious! The hardest part was keeping a straight face and acting innocent, especially when they had me lifted up by my legs and I just reached over and grabbed the feces filled clothing beside me.
After they finally got me all cleaned up, Daddy propped me up next to him and let me briefly take notes in his journal. I added what I was learning from the current speaker. He took it away, though, when I kept chewing on the end of the pen. He really shouldn't complain, he does it all the time, too. He later wrote over my very accurate notes as if they were just simple lines across the page.
He also attempted show me how to do something he called a "selfie" with Mommy's phone. Mommy has done these with me in the past, but Daddy was attempting to show me how to do it myself with my foot. I caught on quickly, and tapped my foot on the screen to take the picture. Just before I did so, however, I intentionally ruined the shot by spitting up! Just look at Daddy's reaction in this picture!

I am hilarious! Notice the poise I can keep while pulling pranks like this one.

Do not worry, I was nice to them as well, I even allowed them to cuddle me some as we watched the speakers.

Mommy and Daddy also let me lay around naked for awhile on my belly. I loved it, but for some reason Daddy took pictures of me. I would never let him post those, though! I am a lady, after all.

Love,

Princess Ellie

Almost 5 Months

Princess Dress-Up

I love to play dress-up, just like any other princess.  I have so many cute outfits. Of course, I'm what makes them adorable, but a cute outfit definitely does not hurt. I have heard that many of my faithful readers are those that gave my family those gifts. If you are one of those who did that, I thank you, and will repay your kindness by graciously awaiting further presents. My parents have informed me that this is not the typical means by which one thanks another for gifts, but I am not typical, I am a princess. You have set a precedent, and you are thoroughly expected you to live up to it. You have thirty days.
The only problem with having so many cute outfits and loving dress up is finding a reasonable excuse to dress up in as many as I can everyday. I have attempted just telling Mommy that it is now time for a wardrobe change, but she played ignorant to my needs and left me in my boring clothes. They had been cute, but it had been a couple hours since I had been dressed in those, and I had grown tired of looking down and seeing them. So I had to find another way of expressing the urgency that obliged her to change my clothes. Finally, my loyal peasants, I have found the means by which I may accomplish this feat. Now, I am going to make you privy to my secret, but you may not think any less of me for sinking to such depraved means, for I am your princess, and you are not to forget that. The manner by which I ensure that my clothes will be changed is by storing up my urine for as long as possible and then releasing it to such an extent it escapes the waste removal garment which I wear beneath my clothes. In this way, my clothes become soiled and must be changed. I have been successful at parading myself in four outfits in one day, not including my jammies. It has been a success, and I plan on utilizing this talent for as long as possible.
In other news, I have visited more of my loyal subjects, some who even read my diary. I expect all of my people to read my blog, so for the welfare of your fellow underlings, please let them know that they must read my diary. Or else they, too, will be expected to pay an outfit tax.
Today I met a boy again that I have met in the past. He is cute, and seems interested, but we will have to see how it goes. His mother tried to force him to kiss me, so I turned my cheek towards him. I have already had that once before. I have to say, though, that I got kind of jealous, because Daddy was taking pictures of this boy and his family when he obviously should have been photographing me instead. Oh well, perhaps he will win my love with clothes.
Love, but the type which a monarch has for her subjects and not the type that might be growing between me and about ten boys under the age of two,
Princess Ellie
PS Besides clothes, I also like books. And toys. And mirrors. And my own television. And clothes.

A Day in the Princess' Office

This is a little transcript about the day I told you about a week or so ago when my Daddy photographed me at work. He is always working at his desk, so I learned really well how I should go about working at my own Princess desk. When he arrived for the photos I was surprised at first as I had not expected any paparazzi that day.

But I welcomed him into my office with a "Hi Daddy!"

I got into work and found myself completely overwhelmed with projects that I had to accomplish.

"Whoa!" I said. "There is a ton of stuff on my plate!" 

Daddy was unhelpful, though, and just kept taking photographs. I cannot complain, however, because he was currently employed as my photographer. So I got to work taking care of official state business.

I eventually accomplished one project and threw it on the ground triumphantly, only to be informed that I still had one more to work on.

I nearly cried under the pressure.

So I would get to work on the next project...

...only to discover that another one had taken the old one's place.

So I just gritted my gums and kept on working.

Occasionally I would look at the clock and wonder how the time had passed so quickly.

"I needed those reports yesterday!" I would yell frantically at my cabinet.

 I do not know why people in power are always yelling at their cabinets, but luckily there were some behind my Daddy I could yell at. I looked at my Daddy for assistance in getting the cabinets to comply. "Can you not do anything about that?"

He would just laugh and keep working. It is probably for the better as I do, after all, outrank him. Whenever I would remember this I would laugh maniacally.

It was quite hilarious to me, so I laughed maniacally for awhile.

Occasionally I had meetings with important people who were still beneath me. "Yes, underlings, what would you like?"I would ask when they entered.

I would most often just stare them down until I got my way.

If I got bored with the meeting, I would have somebody important walk in and give me some official news that would cut the meeting short. "Yes?" I would say, "Yes, that is quite important and requires my attention immediately."

And then I would shoo them away, watching them go to make sure they were completely out the door before I went back to work.

Eventually the hard work wore me out.

I rubbed my eyes...

...Finished my work, and said "Pull the cah around, Chahles" in my best Royal Accent.

Daddy excused himself to become my chauffeur, and I smirked at him as he left, letting him know it was nice working with him.

I then went to bed where I slobbered all over the place and got upset over nothing. All in a normal day of Princess work.